is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
I forget how to act sober
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