Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
