White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
Randomize
