Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
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