You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
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