is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Green mimosas i think yes
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Randomize
