dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
Dude, I just masturbated with my cat sleeping on my boobs....
You have GOT to get this crazy cat lady thing under control. I'm finding you a man. And you'll take him, and thank me. After that text, you have no right to be picky.
Randomize
