I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
Randomize
