I didn't shave. On purpose
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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