Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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