ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Randomize
