I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
