Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
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