just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
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