I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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