your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
Randomize
