He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
he's single and there are thong briefs.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize
