My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Let's paint friendship bongs
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
