quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
Dear god my vagina.
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