So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
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