Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
Are my feet made of real feet?
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
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