she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
This toilet bowl is my home.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
