i dont even know how to be here
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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