shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
