i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
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