At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
