I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
