I cannot find my penis.
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
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