This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
this just has baby written all over it
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
This is my life. Enjoy the view
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
