it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
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