what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
