you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
Dick very happy bro
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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