so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Semen is not good for contacts.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
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