i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
is wine microwaveable?
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
Randomize
