PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
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