i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
he puts the penis in happiness.
How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
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