cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
it's like heaven, but drunker
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
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