Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
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