Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
