Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Tornado booty call.. dedication
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
