I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Randomize
