Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
