As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize
