His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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