Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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