I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
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