put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
Randomize