Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Randomize
