Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
