ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
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